Oh the snow

I really need to tighten up on my finances.....I am finding myself in more and more predicaments because I am simply not careful about how I spend my money. I think part of it is the christmas season, and just not having all that much money, and buying things for people like I have more than I actually do. I think I am going to make that my new year's resolution. Because I am getting really sick of living paycheck to paycheck. I also think I need to start looking for a second job. Oh the joys.

So I really love looking at snow. It makes the trees so pretty, and I kind of feel like I am in a winter wonderland. Haha, I know that sounds really corny, but its true. Driving in it is not so much fun, but it sure is pretty! It kind of looks like a scene straight from a christmas movie, like White Christmas or some other one, sometimes even like a fairytale, like the scene in Beauty and the Beast where they are playing in the snow. You know which one I am talking about ;)

HMM....I get to work a 32 hour shift today. Well, today into tomorrow. I sometimes feel like everyone asks me to hang out like 3 hours before I am going to work, and then it probably appears that I am a workaholic. (which recently I have discovered that I probably am...oops) But if I don't keep myself busy I have a tendency to feel really bad about myself. Who the heck knows why.

This whole blogging more thing is goin okay...I feel like I am complaining more than I had been, and I also feel like I am saying "I" alot. But who the heck cares, cause its my blog right? Not like many people are reading it, I am more doing it for myself. (But sometimes I do wish more people read it) I think that is all for today. Time to prepare for work

Anything you can do I can do better

I am venting for the first paragraph of this, and if there is anyone reading who will be offended I am going to apologize right now. So my parents got a new car today. They needed it, and I know that. I got my car three months ago (and I LOVE my car, best car I have ever had) but of course they have to one up me and get a new car three months later with all the bells and whistles. And when I say that I kinda mean it...heated seats, radio controls on the steering wheel, frickin blinker lights on the mirrors. I know its stupid and totally not true at all but when it comes to things like this I always feel like I am being one-upped. like BAHAHA this is better than yours. Okay end jealous rant.

I have been down today. I don't really know why. I think part of it has to do with the stuff I am doin at work, part of it has to do with people in my life, and a lot of it has to do with me in general. I was talking about this with a friend tonight but I feel like you change so much in your twenties. I feel like you grow up a lot, and (this sounds kind of horrible) but you grow in and out of relationships. Some of which you were sure would be lifelong...and ones you find are stronger than others. It also seems like you find out that you aren't invincible. Ahh, the growing years. Why did no one warn me of this.

Okay I promise next time I will not complain as much.

DECEMBER

My goal of this month is to blog a little bit more. I guess I have been so spotty with blogging cause I feel like all I am going to do is complain...so if I am, please tell me. And if you like my blog tell me that too!

Got my new glasses today. I am still adjusting to them because they are so different than anything I have ever gotten for glasses before. There a picture at the end of the post....opinions would be great!

I am going to see HP7 part 1 again today. I am not gonna lie, I am pretty excited about it :) I was worried that the movie wouldn't be good but I actually thoroughly enjoyed it.

I have decided that the best feeling ever in the winter is getting into a bed with flannel sheets. I just got a pair on the day after thanksgiving because they were relatively cheap and I needed a pair, and oh my word, my bed is so much more comfortable to sleep in. LOVE IT.

Okay, I think that is all for today. It's short, but its a good start to my goal of the month

Relationships

So I have been thinking a lot lately about the different relationships that I have in my life. Relationships with my friends, family, coworkers, residents. Just relationships in general. There are relationships that are stronger than other ones, and ones that I wish I didn't suck so bad at maintaining. I also think about the relationships that I have let go, and the people that I thought I would always talk to. I mean I  know that every single relationship you make in your life isn't necessarily going to be a lifelong relationship, but there are some that you really thought you would. I don't know if it is just the age that I am at or what but its been something that has been on my mind a lot.

 I bought new boots today. I should have totally felt guilty about it, but to be honest, I really didnt. I needed a pair of winter boots that I can wear to work, or when I am goin out and what not so I am kind of excited about them. Okay, really excited about them.

One thing I learned today is that a cup of coffee can go a long way. And I don't mean the caffeine. I picked up a shift at work this weekend that had been filled, then not filled, then filled again, then at the last minute not filled. I covered the shift cause one of the people that was supposed to work told me they didnt feel well, so I was like whatever I will work it. So the person I worked on sunday brought me a cup of coffee and it totally made my day today :)

I suck at thinking of new titles

Guess I am not all that original. I like to be creative and witty with my titles and sometimes it just doesn't come to me. Here I sit at Cheri's. We have had a very fun and productive time together! Last night we decided we were going to try and make new things. So we made some YUMMY YUMMY candy....its milk chocolate and white chocolate with peppermint sticks on top (otherwise know as candy canes) You pay good money for that kind of candy elsewhere. We also made funnel cake, that turned out really good! We are just little bakers.

So we are supposed to get this big ol' snowstorm tonight. I always think that it is super pretty right after it snows. I like the way it looks on the trees, and how fresh it is before people walk and what not. Kind of reminds me of fresh starts. The things I do not like about snowstorms include driving in the snow....shoveling....when I step in a slushie puddle and my shoes and socks get all wet.

I will post more later...sooner than the this post?!

Funday Friday

If I could change one thing that I did growing up it would be how I treated my mouth. Seriously. I just didnt care. And for those of you youngens who think its not a big deal, it is. I feel like I am dealing with WAYYY more crap in my mouth than I should have to deal with at my age. Oral Hygiene is important, and you best believe that when I have children they will have impeccable teeth.  I will instill on them that their teeth and their mouth is important. I could go around blaming everyone else...my parents, all of the dentists I have seen...but the only person I can point fingers at is me, myself and I. UGHHHHHHH. I have been really angry with myself because of it, but I realize that isnt gonna do any good. I can take care of the problems and move on. Am I embarrassed about the condition of my mouth? Oh you can bet I am. I hate talking about it so this is probably the first and last time it will be mentioned here. On that note...DONE.

I feel bad for Thanksgiving. It truly is the forgotten holiday. I mean yeah, there arent a bajillion songs about it, and you don't go around and get candy from your neighbors but COME ON. I love Thanksgiving. I love spending the day with my family, whether it be the residents I work with or my family, or if I am lucky enough, both. But COME ON....Christmas music being played already? ITS NOVEMBER 12th. Don't get me wrong, I love Christmas and everything that comes with it, but we haven't even celebrated Thanksgiving yet. At least wait two more weeks before thinking about it. Cause we will all get sick of it. Promise.

I am SOOO excited and ready for our family vacation to Izaty's this year :):) It is a week where my family gets away, and yes...it can be hectic and loud and crazy but I look forward to it. I am also looking forward to it becaue I am taking a week off of work this year for it, which will be so much needed when it comes. YAY!

Hmm...Every week I say I am gonna start working out next week. Hasn't happened yet. OOPS. lifestyle change that needs to be accomplished. It will happen....someday. Call it a cliche but I think I am gonna get SERIOUS after New Years. Not a resolution necessarily but more of a...goal. Oi.

On a last and final note...there is someone mowing the lawn who I do not know. Creepy. Peace out! Thanks for reading!

Untitled by Annie

So I got 2 of my wisdom teeth pulled today. If any of you remember when I got one pulled in August I just had Novocaine. Well, same deal today, just Novocaine. I did bring my ipod today, so I had something to listen to this time, instead of the awful sounds that accompany getting your teeth pulled. Well all was good till the novocaine wore off, ever since then, even with pain meds, I have been in pain. And now I am scared to go to sleep casue if I go to sleep I am just gonna wake up in pain in the middle of the night. AND here I go again complaining when there are most def. people out there that have it worse than I do. I just pray for those people. That in a few days when I am no longer in pain, and they still are that they can get some relief from their pain.

This weekend at work was hands down one of the best weekends that I have had in awhile. My job can get a little crazy and overwhelming at times, but then I have a weekend like I did this past weekend, that is just fun and semi relaxing and its just a good reminder of how wonderful my job actually is.

I think thats it for tonight. I am gonna try to get a little bit of sleep.

Simply Exhausted

I tell ya, the last few weeks have just been exhausting. Between Jamie and B's wedding, work, training, being an election judge, confirmation at church, and everything else in between I am just tired. And then factor in there personal problems and money problems and its like WOAH. And I know I have a good life, and there are people out there that are a heck of a lot more exhausted than I am but tonight, I just know that I am tired. And I know I havent blogged much over the last few days, but it was kind of at the bottom of my list of importance!

Election day....if you have ever served as an election judge then ya know what I am talking about. If you simply see us sitting there chit-chatting, joking, reading or what not and think we are doing nothing please erase that thought...RIGHT NOW. Yes. During the day there is a little bit less to do with that many hands on deck, but we check everyone in, count the ballots, count the ballots again, be polite, initial the ballots, make sure people's ballots go into the machine (without looking at their ballot, cause you know, we might just be a spy..jk)  Then, closing the polls....might be the most stressful part of the day. It was for me tonight. There are 9 other people there, who all want to get the same things done, and of the 10 of us, 2 of them are supposed to be the "go to" people...the head judges...leaders...and so on and so forth. So its basically mass chaos for about an hour, then ya get to go home. I am lucky. I work in a good precinct where 99% of the voters are very kind and friendly, so if you are an election judge and had to deal with a cranky person today, I am sorry. Okay enough about election judging.

My room smells like poo. And my door wasnt open all day, but my moms dog is laying next to me and I am pretty sure he raided the litter box before coming in my bed. Ish. LOL. Why is it that dogs choose to eat the most absolutely disgusting things? Cat poo, baby diapers, used feminine products, coffee grounds, sticks of butter? I mean, if we ingested all of that pretty sure we'd be dead (or probably wish we were).

Speaking of the things we ingest. BOO election day is never good for me. We always do a potluck, and we always have so many snacks and yummy food. So you more than likely do not want to know everything that I put in my mouth today. The thought of it makes me a little grossed out. I seriously need to get my eating under control. I eat like a cow almost all the time. And the worst part about it is, I am self concious of it. I am always aware of the people that are around me, and wondering whether or not they are judging me for what I am putting ingesting. I have made a concrete goal that in January (No, its not a New Years resolution, it is simply 2 months from now and thats when I want to buckle down) I am going to rejoin weight watchers. It worked really well for me when I was actually following the program. My mom said she would do it with me, and I kind of hope she does. It would be good to have each other for moral support.

For someone who is exhausted I am shocked I am still typing. Endless ramblings. lol. please  note the last word in the title of my blog. OH man, I tell ya. K peace y'alls.....Thanks for reading.

Until next time....

Stick with me

Do you ever just have so much on your mind, so much you could write about, that it just fills you up? Ha, thats how I feel tonight. So where to start....

Hmm, yesterday and today I did slightly better being conscious about what I was stuffing my face with, but at the same time I feel like I need to be MORE SO. I need to literally start measuring out portion sizes. Soo, this week I did the pop thing, next week its literally measuring out my food.

I miss Wilderness. I miss the people from there, I miss the silence, I miss paddling, I miss Saunas, I just miss it all. I think part of that is due to the fact that I didn't go up there once this summer. Part of me just felt like I didnt belong up there or something when I went up the previous summer, most of it was the fact that there was just a lot going on in my life this past summer. Part of it is the fact that I don't have the priorities in my life straight. But lately, I just have this ache to go back up there. I think of how much the people and the time I spent up there changed my life, and really shaped who I am. I feel like I have lost so much of what I had gained, that I let things slip. I started to go back into some of the ways I had that I didn't really like about myself, I stopped trusting in God, stopped trusting in myself. I am a happy person, but there are parts of me that I so want to shape still. Luckily I am working at it everyday! I am so blessed to have such wonderful people in my life who are there to be a shoulder to cry on, people to laugh with, pray with, share in times of celebration with. Go me.

I did say that I wanted a place to be random and raw and I guess thats what this is. If you are reading it and bearing through it then you pretty much rock. I feel like I need a joke to lighten this up. I promise they won't always be heavy ;) Stick with me!

Windy!

HOLY WIND! I don't know how windy it is around everyone else, but I am shocked we haven't lost power yet here.

So today I start with my "lifestyle changes." EPIC FAIL is all I have to say for today. I started out the day pretty good. Ya know, a bag of pretzels here, water, the usual. Then I go to work and BAM, its like I just eat....all time there. Here is what my food consisted of at work: Apple (not too bad), 2 nutty bars (and by 2 I dont mean two individual ones, I mean two packages with 2 in each package), lots of cooler ranch doritos, a whole can of spaghettios, and a few random pieces of chocolate. OH and then on the way home I decided to get ice cream. A friend said to me, "why don't you just change your ways tonight?" to which I replied, "nope, I have already had this conversation with myself like 4 times." Wanna know the funny thing? the blizzard wasn't even as good as I thought it was going to be. Tomorrow is a new day. As far as the whole work thing, I really think what I need to do is start keeping healthy snacks there. It is kind of inevitable that I am going to snack at work. Somedays there is just a lot of downtime and all of us just kind of sit around and snack. Not the best thing to do but we do it. So MAYBE if I just stop bringing crap for myself I will stop eating like crap. Part of me is tempted to start weight watchers again...just to get myself back on track. We will see....

Why is it that the nights that you need a lot of sleep, you find yourself tossing and turning? You are up thinking about the most ridiculous things, and looking at the clock what seems like every 20 minutes? I had that happen to me last night, and when I woke up this morning I found out that my obligation had been moved and I was super tired so I went back to bed for a little bit. I just woke up and was dragging because I had kept myself up so much. HMPH.


Hmm...I dont really have much else on my mind (right now) and I am rambling, so off to bed I go. Hopefully.

Naps

I got up at 5:30 this morning, and it was one of those mornings that when I got out of bed, I knew I would be taking a nap later on. Sure enough, I got home from work and crawled right back into bed and took a fabulous nap (where I dreamt that my sister was pregnant, which I am PRETTY sure isn't gonna happen anytime soon, if at all again) I slept for about an hour and a half and woke up a little bit ago and I have mixed feelings about my nap. Pretty sure that I could probably go back to sleep again for another half an hour or so, and that makes me feel really lazy cause who wants to sleep that much of their day away. I also feel a little relieved that I was able to take a nap today, because I am still pretty tired from the hustle and bustle of last week. Hmm, maybe I just need to start limiting how many naps I take in a week, like I took a nap today so maybe no nap tomorrow. Little kids don't even realize how good they have it, you know, with naps scheduled into their daily routines :).

So at the beginning of this year I decided to give up pop. I stopped drinking it in January, and then in July started to drink it again. I had one pop when I was traveling in DC with my sister and Cheri cause I didnt really feel like spending 4 bucks on a bottle of water. Well it was kind of a waterfall effect. One pop here led to another one, and then another one, then BAM...before you know it I am drinking pop regularly again. BOOOO Annie. Pop is so bad for you in so many ways, and one thing I really want to try with my whole "lifestyle change" goal is to stop drinking pop (again) I just decided this starts today, which is a good thing cause I didn't have any pop yesterday OR today. So there ya go. Step number one has been taken.  As far as the rest of the steps I need to take....bear with me people, I think its gonna be a process.

So I am going for this promotion at work, and today I was helping my supervisor (boss?) out with some stuff that someday I will more than likely be doing. I was a little confused with all of it, but it was also so interesting and I actually enjoyed doing it. It made me really excited for the possibilities to come. I think I will know more within the next couple weeks, so we will see.

I think that may be all for now. Thanks for reading!! Come back again for more sometime!

Trying out this whole blogging thing

I was talking to a good friend of mine and we both decided that we were going to start blogging. I decided it will be for lots of reasons, and whether or not people read this doesnt matter cause I am doing this for me. Lets see, where should I start today???

Two of my best friends got married yesterday! I have known them both for quite awhile and was there when they started dating. I have been there through the tears, the celebrations, the proposal and I have seen the love they have for eachother and the passion they both have for God. I know that they are gonna make it all the way, because they were truly made for each other. I was honored to be able to stand up there for Jamie, because she has been there me so much over the last few years.

I am currently watching the Amazing Race and all of the commercials are frickin political commercials. I am so glad that elections are next week because then all of the slanderous, ANNOYING ads will be done. You know you hate them too.

Last subject of the night. Weight/laziness/self-esteem. Ack, it is such a big subject and such a touchy one for me, because I feel overweight and gross about 60% of the time. I am a pretty happy person, but my self esteem is kinda in the toilet. I have a HUGE goal these days of changing my eating habits and working out more. Here is the tough thing about that. It's not going on a diet or just starting to workout, it is changing a lifetime of bad habits that have been formed. So thats my goal.I just want to get on track and start to feel good about myself again. k thats it, I am signing off for the night. I am sure there will be much more to come in the future :)